Hack-extrodinare D.J. Caruso to direct "Preacher"

Straight from the mouth of Satan's Twitter account, we now know who will direct the development-hell friendly adaptation of Garth Ennis' Vertigo series, Preacher. In case you aren't familiar with it; I'll give you Wikipedia's (always the best source) description:

Preacher tells the story of Jesse Custer, a down-and-out preacher in the small Texas town of Annville. Custer was accidentally possessed by the supernatural creature named Genesis in an incident which killed his entire congregation and flattened his church.

Genesis, the product of the unauthorized, unnatural coupling of an angel and a demon, is an infant with no sense of individual will. However, as it is composed of both pure goodness and pure evil, it might have enough power to rival that of God Himself. In other words, Jesse Custer, bonded to Genesis, may have become the most powerful being in the whole of living existence.

Custer, driven by a strong sense of right and wrong, goes on a journey across the United States attempting to (literally) find God, who abandoned Heaven the moment Genesis was born. He also begins to discover the truth about his new powers. They allow him, when he wills it, to command the obedience of those who hear and comprehend his words. He is joined by his old girlfriend Tulip O'Hare, as well as a hard-drinking Irish vampire named Cassidy.

During the course of their journeys, the three encounter enemies

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and obstacles both sacred and profane, including: the Saint of Killers, an invincible, quick-drawing, perfect-aiming, come-lately Angel of Death answering only to “He who sits on the throne”; a serial-killer called the 'Reaver-Cleaver'; The Grail, a secret organization controlling the governments of the world and protecting the bloodline ofJesus; Herr Starr, ostensible Allfather of the Grail, a megalomaniac with a penchant for prostitutes, who wishes to use Custer for his own ends; several fallen angels; and Jesse's own redneck 'family' — particularly his nasty Cajun grandmother, her mighty bodyguard Jody, and the 'animal-loving' T.C.

I'll admit to having not read the entire series, so I'm no fanboy, but this irritates me. Most of my irritation comes from the fact that we're going to get another movie that proudly proclaims “FROM THE DIRECTOR OF DISTURBIA”, because Shia LaBoof's XBOX Live account being disconnected = GREAT CINEMA. I do remember seeing portions of his film The Salton Sea on TV once, but all that I can remember was Vincent D'Onofrio's character who had no nose because of snorting too much coke. Oh D'Onofrio, I miss your “I AM HOLLYWOOD'S PREMIERE VILLAIN CHARACTER ACTOR” period. But uh, back to the point; Caruso boasts that he's going “back to the dark side” but once you've fetishized the Michael Bay-aesthetic of “cool” people walking in slow-motion there's really no hope for artistic salvation. Oh well, at this point we can at least hope for post-converted 3D.


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I saved Manhattan from Mothra when I was 15.

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